Friendship between women has the usual
sharing that is the foundation of any relationship. Sharing of thoughts,
feelings, experiences, entire life-stories. There's love, care, support,
understanding…
But there's more than that. A unique
aspect of women friends is, willingness to talk about literally everything.
There is none of that Harry and Sally
stuff, and since we don't consider the Sally and Sally stuff to be much fun, we
are free to talk about whatever. Since there is no need for political
correctness or social niceties, the list of topics to talk about is endless,
and it's all direct, dil se!
That brings us to the big question --
what makes girlfriends tick? When you think about it, you realise a number of
ingredients make up this delectable dish.
Heart-to-hearts: These can be across the table, over the
phone, over whatsapp groups, with a
coffee cup or popcorn in hand, on a drive, in times of distress or on days of
boredom. Basically anytime, anywhere !!
These talks are the oxygen that keeps
our friendships alive. We include the dissection and vivisection of everything,
and we mean everything, under the sun. Right from the convoluted
intricacies of petty office politics to burnt dals and overcooked rice
to our own sex life -- past, present or non-existent.
Problems are identified, solutions
suggested and pearls of wisdom distributed free of cost. Only a
girlfriend can understand the trauma of a white shirt turning off-white or the
deep feeling of hurt at finding a 10k email includes 9k of your original
message.
Only she will nod in perfect
understanding when a friend wants to cry her heart out at a broken
relationship, but says, "I can't, it gives me puffy eyes."
Humour: Theirs is a unique brand. It's just the
right concoction of clean, toilet, sex, and depressive humours, the potency of
each ingredient varying according to the occasion and mood.
Who else but a girlfriend can laugh out
loud at something inane and exclaim in the same breath, "That's
not funny!"
Together we find humour in the sadness
in our lives, then shed a few tears right after, and finally get back to those
same lives, feeling infinitely better.
Men: Girlfriends cannot exist without men. That's the
bottomline. We may not be able to stand them, and yet we cannot do without
them.
Discussing the personality traits of the
lower species adds a dash of spice to an insipid conversation. Putting them
through the shredder gives a purpose to a ho-hum day. Besides, men have their
uses too.
Husbands and in-laws: Rest assured husbands and men are two
different species. Men are merely a pain, husbands a class apart. Swapping
notes on husbands and their percentage of participation in housework, lending
support and understanding, and generally shouldering some responsibility in the
marriage is a time-consuming activity.
Then come in-laws. There is no dearth of
conversation when girlfriends sit down on this subject. Night flashes by in a
wink when married friends get together for a pyjama party.
It's not merely the supreme satisfaction
of saying all the things one wants to one's in-laws but cannot, but the solace
of having cleansed the soul and the comfort of knowing you are not alone in
your suffering that actually goes into making this topic a bonding factor.
Fitness: Girlfriends stick together through thick
and thin, flabby arms and thunder thighs -- even, frizzy hair and breaking-out
skin. Together we confront the temptation of chocolate mousses and the
blandness of boiled veggies like true comrades-in-arms. What more proof of an
undying friendship do you need?
The humour and the fun, the gossip and
the shredding are merely the tip of the iceberg. There's much more that women
share. There's silly laughter and heartfelt tears, meaningful work we do
together or just a chat we have -- all indications of the deep trust we have
for each other.
Even if the whole world turns its back,
these friends will always be there to lend their ear and a perfumed tissue.
Doesn't matter whether we've known each other from pigtails to perms, the
feeling doesn't die with time.
It's a bond no one can break. Not
boyfriends, not husbands,
not mothers-in-law.. :-)